2nd Lead Syndrome

Kim Yoon-Sung (played by B1A4 Jin Young) of Moonlight Drawn by Clouds

This is the night I realized why I always end up adoring the 2nd lead of each movie or series I watch. They are those men who love and love even when they know that the winners of the women they love are already predetermined. They are those men who give everything and do everything that must be done for the ones they chose to love. And subconsciously, I know I’m hoping for someone to that to me. I know I’m hoping to experience the feeling of being desperately loved even when the other person knows I won’t give my heart away. I’m hoping to experience the way they genuinely love their chosen women because I was always that person. I was always in the position of being the lead who turns out to be the second lead. I was always the one desperately expressing love and care to someone who won’t bat an eye. I loved the 2nd leads because they are a reflection of who I am and what I want to receive. In my perspective, it has always been me who is in the giving side. I want to be on the receiving end but simply wanting is different from what’s happening in the reality. I always paid attention to the 2nd leads because the way they selflessly express their love is sometimes more amusing and twitterpating (nakakakilig) than what the leads do. They express love as if it’s the last time before they finally let go what is not theirs. They made their chosen women laugh, was there to comfort them when they’re sad, was there to protect them even if they end up hurting their own selves, was always there to surprise and support them with kind and sweet gestures, was always there to make them feel valued and care for, was always there but never fully appreciated, was always there but their love were never reciprocated. But I hope outside the screen, here in the real world, whoever has the same story as those 2nd leads… I hope they find their own happy endings even if it’s not in the arms of the women they first loved. 🙂


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